Seahaven Private can help you or a loved one on their journey to recovery.
Our supportive and safe environment is the perfect place to achieve lifelong health and wellbeing.
We work together with you and your family to guide your loved one towards agreeing to seek help.
Loving and Living with a Person Experiencing Addiction
Seahaven Private aspires to provide your loved one with the power and knowledge needed for their recovery journey. We aim to empower them to understand the reasons behind their addiction and mental health challenges and give them the tools to address them.
Encouraging your loved one to get treatment
Living with an person experiencing addiction
As well as having a damaging impact on the person experiencing addiction, friends and family members can be affected too. Often, they feel fear and anxiety for their loved ones struggling with addiction.
Sometimes though, the efforts made by family and friends may make it more difficult for a person to start or manage recovery. First, we need to be able to see the warning signs* that your loved one may be struggling with addiction:
- developing problems with cognition and memory
- being lethargic, sleeping more, sleeping irregular hours, appearing unwell or tired
- developing problems at work or school (possibly losing their job or dropping out of school)
- attending social events only if alcohol or other drugs are available; becoming intoxicated before the social event, or attending fewer social events specifically to drink or use other drugs
- Stealing money or valuables to pay for drugs
- Lying about the substance or how much they are using
- Becoming angry, sad, or lashing out when questioned about their substance use
- Experiencing withdrawal symptoms when they are unable to use the substances
- Neglected appearance and poor hygiene.
Information adapted from addictioncenter.com
Friends and family of a person with an addiction
Friends and family can feel that maybe if they changed somehow, their loved one would stop using. You might have had thoughts that they might change if you:
- spent more time with them
- paid for their living expenses
- drove them to and from their dealers/bottle shop for their safety.
- But the truth is, neither you nor your loved one can control or are in control of their addiction.
‘Enabling’ is a term used to describe friends and family of a person with an addiction who do things that make it comfortable for them to keep using. It can present itself in a multitude of different ways.
For example, enabling might look like a mother who drives her son to pick up drugs anytime he needs to avoid him hitchhiking or stealing a car. Or it could be the grandparents that allow their granddaughter to live and do drugs in their spare room, so they can feel that she is safe.
The intention behind enabling behaviour is to help keep their loved ones safe. However, it may allow the addiction behaviour to continue.
An alternative to enabling is ‘detachment with love’. This means responding to our own needs while caring and considering the needs of others. It means that we can be responsible to them, but not for them. As a result, we no longer shield people from the consequences of their behaviour.
Adapted from: hazeldenbettyford.org
Pathway to recovery
Step 1. Education
Educating your loved one about rehab may help ease their concerns about what it’s really like. Sharing success stories about others who have gone through rehab may help them realise that they could also be successful.
They may have the misconception that rehab is just sitting around talking about your feelings all day. Actually, it involves fun activities like paddle boarding, fishing, and cooking, to name a few.
The purpose of rehab is to teach them about the negative health effects of addiction. In our experience, if they do not see their use as potentially harmful or damaging, they are not likely to agree to rehab.
More information on the signs, symptoms and effects of specific types of alcohol and other drug addictions are available on our website under the ‘What is Addiction?’ heading.
Step 2. Give them the idea that it is their decision to go
Make sure never to push or force them to go to rehab. Check in with them about how they feel about rehab and ask open-ended questions. Some examples of questions you could ask are:
- How are they feeling about their use?
- What do you want for the future?
- How happy are you with your life right now?
- How do you feel about rehab?
- What changes do you need to make to have the life you want?
Information adapted from addictioncenter.com
Listen to each answer with an open mind and always be supportive. This conversation could be pretty emotional. But, regardless of what they feel about going to rehab at that moment, remain calm, give comfort and be supportive. Your loved one may need time to really think about rehab and let the idea resonate with them.
Step 3. Be honest
Be open and honest in your conversation with your loved one. Let them know how you feel, how their behaviour affects you, and your thinking patterns. Be kind and show compassion and love always.
Tell them you think rehab would be beneficial and that you just want what is best for them in the long run. If you never tell them about your feelings and thoughts, they may not think you care. Do not place blame; remain calm, and bring all your care, love, and honesty together to help form treatment and rehab decisions.
Information adapted from addictioncenter.com
Step 4. Hold an intervention
Each person lets them know how their use has affected them negatively while letting them know how much they love and care for them and simply want the best for them.
Finding an interventionist can be very helpful because they have experience and can structure the intervention to get the best results. The goal of the intervention is to have the person with an addiction agree to go to rehab. After the intervention, going to rehab should be immediate. You do not want to wait and give them a chance to change their mind.
We will work with you and your family to guide your loved one towards acknowledging their unhealthy use and agreeing to get help.
How does it work?
Call us or send an online enquiry and our qualified team will answer all your questions. Then, we’ll set up an initial phone consultation with you to better understand your situation and how you are living with someone who has an addiction. You will receive information to assist you and your family understand the process. Change is possible.
We are here for you to support your loved one to get help.
Looking for Addiction Rehab Support?
If you or a loved one are struggling with addiction, let Seahaven guide you to a place of safety and recovery. Our rehab retreat is a sanctuary from the turmoil of living with alcohol or other drug addiction.
We are here to help.
Find out more about our Day Program & Residential Program.
Contact Us Today